Step outside your comfort zone… just pace yourself.
Nothing of any great significance has ever been achieved overnight.
My line of work as a coach exposes me to many different types of people. Some are motivated, some are inspired, some are confident… yet many are not. These “are nots” are the people who are the polar opposite of the aforementioned “some” and tend to make up the majority of those whom I engage with. While this may appear to be obvious given my role as a personal development coach, it still amazes me to this day just how many people live such disempowered lives, debilitated by their fear of failure, judgement of others, or lack of confidence. For most of the “are nots”, a few sessions focused on uncovering just how accomplished and capable they really are, opens their eyes to the possibilities and opportunity hidden in right in front of them in plain sight! It’s this newfound possibility and opportunity that allows them to muster the confidence to step outside of their comfort zone, where the real magic of personal development and growth begins.
Unbeknownst to many, the obvious true path to success or any degree of personal development, is simply made up of three elements - decisiveness, focus, and commitment to task completion. All it takes is a decision to make a change, the focus on a goal or a series of tasks to complete, and a commitment to taking action to complete them. In essence, any positive change or success in life is achieved simply through task completion.
When setting out to make change, I often encourage the people I work with to set a timeframe longer than they think they would need to effect it. Most people set competitive deadlines or targets of “change within thirty days” or perhaps even sixty days. The reality is however, that long lasting positive change occurs through consistent application and completion of smaller actions or steps, that form positive habits in regard to activity and lifestyle. This of course can’t happen in thirty or sixty days after years of repeat patterns of continued unhelpful habits and behaviors.
I give it six months.
At an absolute minimum, I prescribe at least ninety days to give any change in lifestyle or behaviors a chance to really stick. Ideally, I’d recommend six months (approximately one hundred and eighty days), and would do everything in my power to encourage my clients that this is the most opportune time frame to adopt. It allows for good positive actions to be taken, habits to be formed and lifestyle choices to occur and become commonplace. There are no quick fixes in life, and anything worth putting the time and energy into achieving takes just that, time and energy. Six months may seem like long time when you’re standing at the beginning of it, however, upon completion, reflection will show you that it’s not that great a deal of time out of your life, especially when positive changes to behavior and lifestyle are being made.
Repeat patterns of continued behaviors.
I really like this phrase, because it can be used to describe both edges of the behavioral sword for many of us. On one hand, our existing unhelpful or negative habits are formed in this manner, repeating patterns of continued behaviors. The same choices and decisions over and over again, because they’re safe, and easy, meaning that we don’t have to wrestle with choice or difference options. Many overweight people find themselves in the situation they are in because of repeating patterns of continued behaviors in regard to food and lifestyle choices. Once those behaviors are ingrained, the patterns too become reinforced into lifestyle. I know this because I have lived it myself, as I was once obese and trapped in a cycle of bad food choices and poor lifestyle decisions... all because at the time it was just easier. It wasn’t until I understood that I was already making decisions, although now unconsciously, that I realized that I just needed to consciously change the kinds of decisions I was making, through practice and repetition, something which I also understood was not going to happen overnight and was going to take focus, energy, commitment and time!
This is where the “other hand” finally comes in. Unconsciously repeated patterns of continued behavior are what have previously created our current unfavorable situations, and consciously repeated patterns of continued positive behaviors is what is going to get you out of it. The key here is to make positive changes to behaviors through conscious decision making, and by continuing to do so over an extended period of time. This is where the six-month time frame comes in, as you need to allow ample time to give these new habits and behaviors time to “stick”. Previously formed bad habits and behaviors didn’t need a time frame, because they were unconsciously forming without our awareness. Soon to be formed good habits and behaviors do need some time frame to allow them time to be reinforced. This is why thirty / sixty and sometimes ninety day programs don’t always work (although as mentioned before, ninety is better than thirty, because the longer the better).
Baby steps.
Think of positive lifestyle and behavior change in regard to goals or whatever it is you are looking to achieve as being similar to learning to walk. As an infant, you had no conscious awareness of time frame or any self-imposed limitations, so you went ahead and did it anyway, and it took time. Slowly but surely, the transition from rolling, to crawling, to stumbling and then walking occurred. Then you were running, living your best life. The process is no different as an adult, only now through the passage of time we have a conscious awareness of time, self-imposed limitations, lack of confidence and fear to deal with. Consider the previous examples I have shared and take a chance on making one small decision to do something different today, towards whatever it is you want to work towards achieving. Then another tomorrow, and then another the next day, and so on and so forth. Don’t be another “are not”! Keep taking single steps and continue putting one foot in front of the other, as incremental steps today lead to monumental strides tomorrow!
….and ACTION!
Don’t wait. Take action today. Every day you hesitate is one more day you never get the chance to take advantage of again! Decide what it is you want to do, sit down and formulate a plan of everything you need to do to achieve it, and start taking the necessary steps towards working to achieving it! Even if you only complete one task each day, progress is still progress.
Remember. Any success or outcome that anyone else you’ve ever admired or looked up to achieved simply occurred through task completion, whether consciously or unconsciously. Now that you know this, you can be more empowered to live life consciously, and let me tell you, that is the kind of life worth living!
If you never consciously take the first step, you’ll forever remain in place… and life will just pass you by (and who wants to live like that?). Start your journey today, and remember, conscious positive permanent change takes time… and that’s still better than the alternative!
See you in six months!
Until next time, please check out my previous posts for all things motivational, self-help and personal development by subscribing to me (click here) — and if you’re interested in developing yourself further in your own time, check out my Facebook page Shining Wisdom (by clicking here) and pick up a copy of my book “Think Success!”, available to download now on Amazon for less than the price of a small coffee (get your copy by clicking here)!
Have an amazing day!
